Saturday, 16 August 2008

Folked off

Broadstairs folk week, a Thanet taxi drivers dream (allegedly). The reality is probably in the realms of his/hers worst nightmare.
Saturday evening trip 7pm from Ramsgate to Broadstairs. Male " are you busy", marks for originality '0'. Male " How far into Broadstairs can you take me". Me "bottom of the high street". Male " ok drop me at the dolphin", marks for intelligence '0'. Male " can you come back at midnight to collect us", marks for optimism '10'.

Sunday morning trip 1am from Broadstairs to Ramsgate. Male " Milscchhh bart". Me "sorry". Male to partner " eees mutton", male to me (shouting and spitting) " arbor, milscchhh bart". Me being ignored, conversation between male and partner as interpreted by a driver with many years experience. Partner " have you got a chewing gum, I can still taste the sick". Male" if that beers off and I get ill, i'm going to complain tomorrow". Partner " It was that busy I didn't make it to the toilets, look at the state of my shoes". Male " I know what you mean, you couldn't hear a word over the bands". Thoughtful pause. Male "blinding night though". Partner " I'm going to put my bells away for next year".

Saddest sight of the week:- The police tent over the council offices in Albion place, Ramsgate.

Funniest sight of the week:- Having about 5 different people (including 2 males), answering my shout for " taxi for Charlotte" outside the Natwest bank in Broadstairs. Then all of them trying different doors to get in first.

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